when you have no one, no one can hurt you.

yeah, i've abandoned this for the most part. moreso my hectic schedule hasn't let me devote as much time as i'd like to this. but now! now, i'm sitting in my quiet living room, among two little reading girls and one boyfriend whose time is being spent washing the son-dog.

the past few weeks have been pretty eventful. with a weekend trip to florida followed days upon days upon days of working, attending school, and finding zero time to do anything social. even though, when i look at it, i'd rather be spending my time staying busy than dialing any of the numbers in my phonebook.

school has been.. school. waking up, listening to professors blither about what they think they know best. and work has been hectic. the possibility of a bonus upon writing a press release has taken up most of my time there. oh, and i had my "90 day review" last week. one outstanding topic of conversation was my 'fashion sense'. and how it was 'different'. now, considering i'm going to school to one day write for a fashion magazine, i can understand if my fashion forward-ness is a little too much for someone to handle. however, when this comment comes from a woman, barely 10 years my senior, that wears items hot off the sales rack at marshalls, i'm a little taken aback. not to mention the fact that i get a compliment pretty much every day from a client telling me that i wear what the models wear in the magazines we stock at the salon. i've ignored it for the most part but it definitely has taken a toll on the joy that i used to have walking in there every day.

i've got pictures to share and plenty to say but i think i've said enough. i'm ready to new york. and if not new york, back to california. i'm so tired of being in this awkward phase in atlanta where i feel like nothing is ever going to happen for me here.. and if i stay here, i'm going to wither away into a career that'll make me want to off myself. so, to new york or l.a. it is. and it should be soon. hopefully, if i get my bearings on straight and handle my money the way i should be and progress in school the way i have been, things should be looking up within a year or two.

and apparently, i can't move into an apartment that isn't next to a fucking fraternity house.

you ain't never gonna shake this sense of sadness.

it seems that i'm posting at the oddest of times. here i am, wide awake at 9pm and eddie is to my right, passed out in his clothes.. complete with his air max's on. ben next to him.

looked through a lot of old pictures tonight and noticed how much i've changed. physically, i still look the same.. kind of. but jesus, i could remember what was going through at the exact time of each picture it felt like. i'm anxious for fall. i feel like a lot of promise is in the next months to come. minor & major changes. including one major trip to new york.

i want to move to new york in a year, by the way. and i'm going to.

we went to tennesee last weekend. eddie got his hair cut. and ben tried to get his rocks off with another boy boxer named mickee. pictoral events:



white trash.


it seems as though ben has issues with sitting directly on his bottom.


gorilla biscuits on the 20th. absolutely worst idea of my entire life. nothing but an entire room of fuck-up's, cigarette smoke, and the guy from righteous jam's terrible voice..





grillin' on the way to pick ourselves up some chic-fil-a #1's.


there's some entertainment at work.. at times.. [it's a wig]


most times.. it's this.


sitting like the perfect little gentleman he is.


date night. casa grande + butterfly effect.



currently.



it's still early. there's still some trouble to find somewhere.